Here I Am!

Posted by Rachel Winnie on

I started seeking the Lord and digging down deep in my studies last year, praying that the Lord would use me as a holy, and worthy vessel. “Send me, Lord” was my daily prayer.


After a few months of praying and asking the Lord to send and use me, the Lord told me to start blogging about my life, specifically my testimony and what He has done and is doing for me.


“I am not a writer God.”

“I don’t speak with eloquent words.”

“I am super private.”

“I have too many skeletons in my closet.”

“Noone cares, God.”


These were just a few of my pushbacks to His plan. So I just kept asking him if blogging was reeaallly what he meant... “I need more confirmation, Lord.”


Every time I asked for confirmation, He pointed me to the story of Moses. Moses kept on protesting to God over and over again how he was not good with words, that he was ill-equipped, and that no one would listen to him. But over and over again, the Lord reassured Moses that he had everything he needed to accomplish the mission. And most importantly, God guaranteed Moses that He would be with him the whole time.


And the Lord asked him, “What is that in your hand?”

“A Shepherd’s staff,” Moses replied.


And the Lord kept asking me, “Rachel, what is in your hand?”


Well, my phone and my computer.... the internet... the World Wide Web…. literally the whole world...


So I answered and said, “Okay God, I will do it. I will start a blog.”


Little did I know He wanted me to start by sharing my testimony with everyone I am connected with on social media... UHHHH… Makes sense, God, but that is just too close for comfort. A lot of my connections are people I’ve met around the world partying and living a wild lifestyle with.


Talk about opening up myself to rejection and judgment. People are going to hate me for this, Lord. UGH


The Holy Spirit brought to mind, John 15:20, “Remember the word that I said to you, ‘A slave is not greater than his master.’ If they persecuted Me, they will persecute you as well; if they followed My word, they will follow yours also.’”


It took me a while, but I finally did it. I posted my blog on my Facebook and IG and sent a private message to everyone I am connected with. Some pleasantly received my message and then I had those who cussed me out and blocked me.


I believe there were many reasons why God told me to message my friends and connections on social media first.

  • Spreading His word.


“It is the same with my word I send it out, and it always produces fruit. It will accomplish all I want it to, and it will prosper everywhere I send it.” Isaiah 55:11

  • Boldness


“And he was with them, moving about freely in Jerusalem, speaking out boldly in the name of the Lord.” Acts 9:28


“Preaching the kingdom of God and teaching concerning the Lord Jesus Christ with all openness, unhindered.” Acts 28:31

  • Make the divide. Proclaim and show the world where my loyalty lies.


“If you need wisdom, ask our generous God, and he will give it to you. He will not rebuke you for asking. But when you ask him, be sure that your faith is in God alone. Do not waver, for a person with divided loyalty is as unsettled as a wave of the sea that is blown and tossed by the wind. Such people should not expect to receive anything from the Lord. Their loyalty is divided between God and the world, and they are unstable in everything they do.” James 1:5-8


“But you are not like that, for you are a chosen people. You are royal priests, a holy nation, God’s very own possession. As a result, you can show others the goodness of God, for he called you out of the darkness into his wonderful light. Once you had no identity as a people; now you are God’s people. Once you received no mercy; now you have received God’s mercy.” 1 Peter 2:9-10

  • Replacing fear of man with the fear of The Lord


“But don’t be afraid of those who threaten you. For the time is coming when everything that is covered will be revealed, and all that is secret will be made known to all. What I tell you now in the darkness, shout abroad when daybreak comes. What I whisper in your ear, shout from the housetops for all to hear. Don’t be afraid of those who want to kill your body; they cannot touch your soul. Fear only God, who can destroy both soul and body in hell.” Matthew 10:26-28


“Then you will discern the fear of the Lord

And discover the knowledge of God.” Proverbs 2:5


“The fear of the Lord is the instruction for wisdom,

And before honor comes humility.” Proverbs 15:33


“Moses said to the people, ‘Do not be afraid; for God has come in order to test you, and in order that the fear of Him may remain with you, so that you may not sin.”’ Exodus 20:20


I still have a lot more to share when it comes to my testimony but God had me start in the hardest place first. It is a lot easier to share my life story with strangers than everyone I’ve known from childhood and everyone I’ve met since.


All that to say, I have recently seen the fruit from God’s word (Isaiah 55:11) when a friend messaged me the other day. I met him a little over 10 years ago and I sent him my testimony on Facebook messenger. He has recently been through some very tough times, and although he knew God as a child and had a praying mother, he was spiritually lost, trying to find his way. He was seeking answers.


Since reaching out to him, my friend has reconnected with God and is seeking the Lord through the Bible and prayer. He is now, himself, reaching out and ministering to his friends and those around him. One of his friends sent a message and thanked him for all the encouraging and uplifting words and shared with him that he was in such a place of despair he had planned a suicide attempt last year and asked for his continual prayers and support.


My friend recently let me in on all God is doing for and through him. He told me when I initially reached out sharing my testimony, that I was sent from God and that it’s only fair he repays the favor to those around him.


This just goes to show that even when we are out of our comfort zone, when we obey the Lord, there is a snowball effect that begins to change the lives of people we aren’t even personally in contact with or connected to.


This was such an encouragement for me; to see the fruits of sharing God’s word and my testimony. And I would not have shared and opened up if God had not pushed me to do so. Sometimes It takes a few times of God calling and directing before we listen and take action.


Abraham, Jacob, Moses, Samuel, Isaiah, and Ananias have some of the most incredible stories in the Bible because when God called on them they all respond with “Here I am.”


Being obedient is hard, especially when it seems to be at our own expense. But the Lord promises to be with us. He will never ask us to do something without His help and provision. And in His goodness, He promises many things if we are obedient…


“If you fully obey the Lord your God and carefully keep all his commands that I am giving you today, the Lord your God will set you high above all the nations of the world. You will experience all these blessings if you obey the Lord your God:

Your towns and your fields will be blessed.

Your children and your crops will be blessed.

The offspring of your herds and flocks will be blessed. Your fruit baskets and breadboards will be blessed.

Wherever you go and whatever you do, you will be blessed.

The Lord will conquer your enemies when they attack you. They will attack you from one direction, but they will scatter from you in seven!

The Lord will guarantee a blessing on everything you do and will fill your storehouses with grain. The Lord your God will bless you in the land he is giving you.

If you obey the commands of the Lord your God and walk in his ways, the Lord will establish you as his holy people as he swore he would do. Then all the nations of the world will see that you are a people claimed by the Lord, and they will stand in awe of you.

The Lord will give you prosperity in the land he swore to your ancestors to give you, blessing you with many children, numerous livestock, and abundant crops. The Lord will send rain at the proper time from his rich treasury in the heavens and will bless all the work you do. You will lend to many nations, but you will never need to borrow from them. If you listen to these commands of the Lord your God that I am giving you today, and if you carefully obey them, the Lord will make you the head and not the tail, and you will always be on top and never at the bottom. You must not turn away from any of the commands I am giving you today, nor follow after other gods and worship them.” Deuteronomy 28

Yes! These promises are for all of God’s children :) We gentiles are grafted into the family and are considered Abrahams descendants. (Romans 11:11-31)!


What is God calling you to do? What do you already have in your hand that can be a tool used for God’s glory and sharing His Good News?


The hardest part is stepping out of the boat.


“And Jesus said, ‘Come!’ And Peter got out of the boat, and walked on the water and came toward Jesus.”’ Matthew 14:29


Is God calling you? If so, I would encourage you to step out and say, ‘Here I am, Lord.’


“God’s way is perfect. All the Lord’s promises prove true. He is a shield for all who look to him for protection.” Psalm 18:30